Classically Abby on What It Means to Be ‘Classic’

When you hear about ‘feminism’ in mainstream media, what does this term really mean?  I attended an all-girls high school and currently attend an all-women’s college where most of the students call themselves feminists.  When you ask them to define what this means, they often say that a feminist is someone who strives for female empowerment and equality.  While these might be good values to strive for, there are also underlying messages that come with being a feminist in today’s day and age; that is, feminism appears inextricably linked to very liberal views including support for “sexual freedom” and pro-abortion policies.  

Admittedly, I was unaware of these underlying messages when I was in high school.  Up until three years ago, I didn’t have a solid worldview with defined moral values.  It wasn’t until I reached college and realized how morally bankrupt the lives of many college students are that I began to establish a concrete belief system.  I began doing my own research on controversial topics, reading different news sources other than the WSJ and NYT, and diving deeper into my faith.  All of these led me to the conservative values I hold today.

As a philosophy major, freedom of speech and freedom of thought are things I value greatly.  One of the main reasons I was dissuaded by supporters of modern-day feminism and liberal values is because they often shut me down, refused to listen, and reflexively opposed what I had to say without giving it any thought.  I would have liked nothing better than to engage in civil discourse regarding my political and moral beliefs, but they often found my views to be too ‘insensitive’ for their liking; they often appealed to emotion during discussions and seemed disinterested in any facts which did not help support their worldview.

I know that my experience is not uncommon; in fact, it’s all too common for conservative women to be silenced for holding the values they do.  I first encountered Classically Abby when I saw a poll that she had done on Twitter which asked: ‘Have you ever been silenced because you were conservative?’  75.3% said yes.  I reached out to Abby regarding her platform as a conservative influencer, and she kindly answered some questions that are shared below.  Here are some of her thoughts on why we should be proud, not ashamed, to be conservative. 

Can you tell me a little bit about yourself and your background?

“My name is Abby and I’m the creator of Classically Abby, a YouTube channel and blog for commentary, fashion, beauty, and opera. I got married almost 2 years ago to my wonderful husband, I’m a religious Jew, and I’m an opera singer. I just recently decided to come out as a #ConservativeInfluencer and start talking about being a classic woman from a conservative perspective.” 

How, when, and why did you decide to become a ‘conservative influencer,’ and what does this term mean to you?  What is your goal and intended message of your content?

“I began my YouTube channel as a place for classic women. For me, classic means tradition refined. It’s elegance, it’s beauty, it’s embracing the past while living in the modern age. I realized quickly that for me, being conservative defined my classic lifestyle. I had been debating coming out as conservative influencer for quite a while, but it was a big decision for me. As an opera singer in an artistic community, being conservative can in many ways destroy your career. But I felt that if I didn’t stand up and say what I believed, then who else would? 

I am hoping to create a community of women who feel comfortable voicing their opinions with each other – a place for conservative women to find a support system so they feel comfortable sharing their views publicly. So often, people on the left feel comfortable voicing their views and those on the right can’t respond. Because conservative ideas really aren’t mainstream in so many younger women’s spaces, there’s a fear that there will be repercussions professionally and personally. It was imperative to me that we have a place where all ideas can be discussed respectfully.” 

How did you come up with the name ‘Classically Abby?’

“I came up with the name Classically Abby pretty quickly, funnily enough! I live a traditional, classic life and I’m a classical opera singer. I’m all about being classic, as I defined earlier, in everything from the clothes I wear to the way I can embrace my femininity to the music I perform. All of that makes me who I am, so it’s classically me!” 

How do you maintain a relationship centered around and driven by faith?

“My question would be, how do you maintain a relationship without those things? Marriage is a huge commitment – finding someone who shares your values and beliefs is so important if you’re in it for the long haul. My husband and I knew that when we got married, we would need to be on the same page about what our religion meant to us because it would affect the total outcome of our lives, from where we were living, to who we would be spending time with, to how we would parent our children, and it has brought us so much closer.” 

Do you have any tips for someone looking to get married young (early twenties)?

“I just recently did a video about dating as a conservative woman! I am a proponent of marriage, but I also try not to pressure young women into getting married young, only because sometimes it’s difficult to meet the right person. I remember, even at 21 I was starting to feel stressed about not being married. So instead, I think it’s important to focus on bettering yourself so that you’ll be ready when the right guy does come along! 

Of course, there are always avenues to meeting people that you should explore. If you’re expecting your husband to fall from the sky, you will probably be disappointed! But going to your place of worship, volunteering, doing things that reflect your values will help you meet people who share them.”  

What are the benefits of being married young?

“I feel so lucky that my husband and I got married at 24. It’s nice to have some time before having children to get used to your roles as husband and wife. Working on your dynamic with one another is so important because your home will be more stable when children do come along. When problems arise, you’re already practiced at working as a team to solve them. As well, being married young allows you to grow together rather than trying to fit someone into your lifestyle with no flexibility. My husband and I constantly talk about how we would like to grow and change with the other’s help.” 

What are the key aspects of having a healthy relationship?

“There are a lot of important things to keep in mind to nurture a relationship. Communication is, of course, key. Being open and honest, even when it’s uncomfortable, is so important. So often, couples are bad at communicating with each other because ego gets in the way. It’s natural to treat arguments as debates and try to win rather than solve the problem, but one thing I heard once was that your partner isn’t the enemy when you’re arguing – the disagreement is. With practice, you can work together to resolve the problem instead of attacking each other. 

As well, I like to say that the best relationships are those where you push each other to be better. You should ask your partner to grow and change in a way that’s beneficial for him and he should do the same. It’s exciting to me that I have grown because of my husband into an even better person than when we first met.” 

In your opinion, why are conservative views the best views to have as a woman?

“Liberal and leftist views seem so attractive to young women. Themes of empowerment and being strong are wonderful, but unfortunately, they have been repackaged to mean something different than their original definitions. Being a conservative woman means embracing the original definitions of these themes – empowerment is recognizing the value of being a feminine woman and knowing your own worth, while strength is doing what’s right for your family, be that pursuing a career or devoting full-time to home. It also means standing hand in hand with men instead of against them. The new definition of empowerment, which we all have heard in 2020, is not actually beneficial to women – women are not happier when they sleep with many partners, they aren’t happier when they expose their bodies for attention, and they aren’t happier when they don’t have children.” 

What are some common misconceptions of being a conservative woman that you wish to clarify?

“I think a lot of people think that conservative women are indoctrinated by men, or that we are imprisoned by the traditional family structure. Neither is true. Conservative women are smart, intelligent people. We have looked at the issues and made our own decisions instead of blindly aligning ourselves with the leftist media. In so many ways, it’s harder to be a conservative woman than it is to be a liberal woman because there are consequences for young conservative women if they speak their minds in women’s spaces – they could lose friends and job opportunities. There’s peer pressure to simply conform. Yet we are the ones who are told that we aren’t thinking for ourselves. 

As far as the family structure, there are differences between the sexes and that’s a wonderful thing. Conservatives don’t believe that the woman should always stay at home and the man should always work. In fact, most conservative women I know do have careers. But we do say that being a mother is an incredibly important role in a woman’s life, and career without family ultimately won’t be fulfilling. We feel strength in our womanhood.” 

How is conservatism more empowering for women than the ‘feminism’ most often touted by women today?

“Feminism in 2020 isn’t empowering. The focus on the here and now, on the body and its appetites, is so much less empowering than focusing on the people you love and the mission you have in this world. I find feminism to be very self-absorbed in a lot of ways – I’d rather leave this world better than I left it than constantly pursue shallow interests “like a man would.” 

Feminists assume a world in which women are definitionally oppressed. According to them, we are fighting against a system that’s working against us. Empowerment in their view can only come as a result of having been victimized. Conservatism is much more empowering for women because it doesn’t trap us in a mindset of victimhood – women are strong and capable and have all the same opportunities as the men around us. As well, if you don’t believe you’re a victim of the patriarchy, you actually have a much bigger support system, that of men and women, helping you succeed. 

Of course, there are individual women who are victims. The problem with feminism is that it assumes that all women are victims simply by nature of their sex, no matter who they are.” 

Anything else you wish to share?

“I am really excited about creating a community of like-minded women who want to explore their views and what it means to be classic, refined, and elegant. Come check me out at ClassicallyAbby.Locals.com to join the #ClassicCrew, and follow me on YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest to keep up with all my new content!” 

No matter your age, it’s never too late to stop accepting everything the culture tells you and think for yourself.  Especially if you don’t feel you have formed a firm moral compass yet, I urge you to read up on conservatism.  Don’t be swayed by the mainstream media; do your own research, and don’t allow your preconceived notions about conservatism to dissuade you from keeping an open mind. Thanks again, Abby, for sharing your thoughts!